The other day, I saw a post on LinkedIn that really struck a chord with me::

“Ambitious women – let’s either join them, celebrate them, or move out of their way.”

It was a hell yeah! moment for me. A phrase that felt like a rallying cry for women who juggle the complexities of career, family, and the desire to create impact.

But then, almost as quickly as the fire was lit, I felt myself recoil.

Why? Because ambition, when applied to women, still carries a cultural weight.

We’ve all felt it, right? The unspoken societal rules:

• Don’t get too big for your boots.
• Be driven, but not too driven.
• Be assertive, but not so much that you come off as “masculine.”

The Double Bind of Female Ambition

This is the double bind we face as women. We’re often seen as less driven than men – and yet when we do display ambition, we’re judged for it.

Studies back this up. A 2018 report by McKinsey & Company found that while women are equally as ambitious as men, they’re 18% less likely to be seen as having leadership potential. Why? Because of unconscious bias that associates leadership and drive with traditionally masculine traits.

Meanwhile, research published in the Harvard Business Review showed that ambitious women face a “likeability penalty.” When women display the same assertiveness and determination as men, they’re more likely to be perceived as unlikable or “too much.”

No wonder so many of us feel conflicted about owning our ambition.

But here’s the thing: we don’t have to shrink ourselves to fit society’s expectations. We can redefine ambition on our terms. Here’s how:

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1. Reframe Ambition as Passionate Purpose

Ambition doesn’t have to be about climbing a ladder just for the sake of it. It can mean striving for a purpose that lights you up and benefits those around you.

According to research from the American Psychological Association, people who tie their ambition to meaningful goals – rather than external rewards like money or status – experience higher levels of happiness and fulfilment. By seeing your ambition as purpose-driven, it becomes less about proving something to others and more about living authentically.

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2. Embrace Ambition as a Feminine Strength

Ambition isn’t inherently masculine. Women bring unique strengths to leadership, such as empathy, collaboration, and vision. Research from Zenger Folkman even shows that women are rated more highly than men on 17 of 19 key leadership capabilities, including initiative and driving for results.

When you own your ambition in a way that aligns with your natural strengths, it becomes a source of power, not something to downplay.

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3. Surround Yourself with Ambitious Women

The company you keep matters. When you surround yourself with women who celebrate ambition, it normalises it.

In fact, studies on social contagion theory show that behaviours and attitudes are contagious. Being around ambitious, driven women can inspire you to embrace your own goals unapologetically. Their support will help drown out the noise of societal judgment.

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4. Call Out the Double Standards

Let’s not shy away from naming the issue. Ambition in women is often judged differently than ambition in men, and that’s a reflection of outdated societal norms.

Consider this: a Catalyst study found that women are often expected to “temper” their ambition to appear more likeable, while men are encouraged to amplify theirs. Acknowledging these double standards – both in conversations and in our own thought patterns – is the first step in dismantling them.

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5. Be a Role Model for the Next Generation

Every time you pursue your ambition, you pave the way for another woman to do the same.

Research published in the Journal of Applied Psychology shows that role models are critical for inspiring women to aim higher in their careers. When young women see examples of ambitious, successful women, they’re more likely to believe in their own potential and pursue leadership roles themselves.

Your ambition doesn’t just impact you – it’s a ripple effect.

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Your Ambition, Your Rules

Owning your ambition is about defining success on your own terms. It’s about refusing to shrink yourself to fit into a box society created for you.

So, let’s stop seeing ambition as a dirty word. Let’s start seeing it for what it really is: passionate purpose.

Because ambitious women? We don’t just have big dreams. We have the courage to chase them.

And to anyone who doesn’t like that? They can join us, celebrate us, or move out of our way.